So how does one start to build a wedding ceremony like any of the above? As you are aware wedding ceremonies are initially written or wordsmithed, they are delivered and said which is a whole lot different to just reading words on a page. And I often say to my couples, the Celebrant is only as good as the talent they have to work with. So the more animated, spontaneous and the genuineness of the Bride & Groom makes an enormous difference in how a wedding ceremony is delivered on the day. Of course, the Celebrant can play his or her part, too, by using the style language in part perhaps, getting into character, dressing to the relevant style and have the presenting skills to be able to apply the expression required relvant to the words.
For me as a Celebrant, much of the content of a wedding ceremony is built on “meet and greets” with the B & G, what they say, how they say it, what they have said they want, what they know, “they absolutely don’t want”, and most importantly, what I observe of the couple. I also pick up information from phone calls and emails, and “facebook”, which depending on the personalities of the couple can provide me with an absolute raft of information. Sometimes, I learn way too much for my own good, but that often gives me great insight into my couples and their characters.
There are a number of styles of wedding ceremonies that I use. In this post I am talking about the above”.
Generally speaking, this style of wedding ceremony, does not suit everybody, and they would be the least common of the styles that I prepare and commonly use. And it is also worth mentioning that, the Pagan Style should only be done by Celebrants and couples’ who strongly believe in the core values and rituals of the Pagan faith. It can become way too complicated if you are not conversant with the mores of this faith.
The way that I go about it is to incorporate parts of medieval or Celtic style or handfasting ceremonies but combine in a more modern way.
When you are using “handfasting” ribbon or cords, try to make the colours, the texture, or the fabric mean something to you. For example if one of the couple is Scottish, you could use their tartan, or incorporate colour/s of the bridesmaids or colours of the rainbow, or a theme. As the Celebrant my preference is that I don’t actually do the binding between the B & G, as I have my hands full and am too busy doing the ceremony, and would rather direct it, rather than do it. And whomever you elect to do the actual, “binding or the handfasting”, it is very important that it is performed well by the person doing it. It should not just be thrown together on the day, and hope it will work, because you have chosen this element to be the focus of your day. There is no point in doing it just for the sake of it and if you are not going to do it well, then don’t do it, is my best advice. I have seen and done a few and mostly the care factor has not been followed through on the actual day by the B & G and or the person doing the binding.
And in essence, there is no excuse for a couple to not have a great ceremony or at least the sort or type of ceremony they would like, because there is so much out there on the internet , there is plenty there to guide you and to get you started at least initially.…… No point in reinventing the wheel, ………….And then you can go to your Celebrant well informed and have them put your wedding ceremony ideas together so that they can personalise it especially for you.
And let’s face it, this style is a little bit different to the average but if you do want something a little bit different, meaningful to you, or quirky then go for it! Be brave, Padawans!
For a wedding Celebrant in Perth please contact Victoria Wheeler